Many are familiar with Gurdjieff’s notion of the different parts of ourselves. Over the years, this has boiled down to the three main centers which we refer to as the moving, feeling, and thinking parts of ourselves. Ouspensky talks about our “higher” centers as well—especially the higher intellectual and emotional. So how do we connect these “higher” and “lower” parts?
Up to now, I’ve compartmentalized those “higher” parts of myself as basically inaccessible. Only reachable through some magical transformation resulting from efforts I either can’t or don’t know how to make. I just slog along, working on my basic centers, which is hard enough!
Like going to a work-event where the practical work is painting, which I don’t really like to do. But hey, what an opportunity! The first day I engaged my body and used my attention to focus my mind on the task at hand. When we stopped every fifteen minutes to come back to ourselves, my feelings were full of gratitude for the sun, the air, the work we were doing together. My attention moved inward, my mind listening for that still point of release, of quiet. In those quiet, inward moments, I was brought closer to my higher thinking and emotional centers. There was no negativity present.
Building a Bridge between Higher and Lower Parts of Ourselves
At Sherborne, Bennett gave us an exercise to create a connection between our “Will” and our ordinary self. It was done at the end of morning exercise and involved making a decision. Combining sensation with visualization, and linking that to a higher feeling, was the bridge. This higher, finer, feeling helped us access the Will, which gave us the ability to “do.”
Madame De Salzmann also encourages us to build a bridge by recognizing the “impression” of ourselves within these higher and lower parts. Can we hold both impressions as part of a connected moment? She also reminds us to work with our resistance, which provides the spark, the “fire” that is needed for work.
On the second day of our recent work event I felt at loose ends, with no clear decision I could link to later in the day. I was not excited at the prospect of painting again. Acknowledging this resistance, I felt what I could decide was to connect to being part of the working group. As the painting session started, I became involved with meticulously cleaning paint smudges and drips from the glass entrance doors to the building. (Cleaning is my forte.) However, I noticed at one point that I was working alone and everyone else was outside with a paintbrush in their hands.
I connected with the feeling I had had during morning exercise that I would be part of the group. So I put away my cleaning supplies, picked up a paintbrush, and joined the others. Throughout the rest of the work session, I continued feeling my resistance to painting. But I also held the “wanting to be part of the group” feeling and worked at focusing my attention on using my brush and being with the others. The resistance didn’t go away but the effort to connect the part of myself that didn’t want to be there with the part of myself that did, remained. And so, I believe one more link between the higher and lower parts of myself was forged.